The Progression Of…

Edibles + Holiday World

I have never been more supported in anything in my life like the quest to get high. All of my weed smoking friends have been giving me advice left and right. Last Monday was no exception, when my friend Pablo came to pick me up he had a hard candy edible with my name on it. Bobby said it should be fun getting high and going to the theme park.

Bobby was a damn lie.

The edible was a star shaped blueberry marijuana flavored hard candy. We tried to break it apart for it to be easily consumable but it would not break so we both just stuck the huge stars in our mouths and carried on towards the entrance.

I think I was one of those people who keeps consuming the edible until they feel something but by then it was too late. The edible had my heart beating so fast I was winded and could barely walk to the first ride. I thought I was going to be the first person to overdose on weed or just die from the adrenaline from the ride + the side effects but I survived and life went downhill from there.

I’m a temperamental walker. Sometimes I get winded easily, especially if I’m walking to work in tight jeans but when I’m traveling I walk like God told me to go save some Egyptians. I wasn’t physically exhausted but my body threatened to fall apart if I moved more than 5-10ft at a time. My limbs felt like they were dead weights. My heart was beating out my chest and I spent majority of the day standing in line for rides slumped over forgetting to breathe.

I didn’t appreciate the numbness. The dehydration.

I’m still wondering why people smoke weed? To feel a numb tingling feeling? To eat a little more? Is there not a cosmic feeling where I run and twerk in a field of potatoes with cherry lollipops? If the goal is to be weighed down and fall asleep, this is the stupidest shit and the biggest waste of my time and life.

I tried the edible again to see if it’d feel any different when lying down at home but it just knocked me out.

At this point, I still haven’t smoked although I have the swishers. I am three times and out with this so hopefully something makes me less judgmental because if I didn’t think it was dumb before, right now, I’m recommending everybody to go to therapy to learn how to manage life without a numbing mechanism.

I mean something has to be fun about this shit. I want to see a unicorn. I want my room to turn into a field of tostadas. What strain does this for you?

Wish me better luck.


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